2006-08-08

Satellite Internet par satellite

(English follows)

Internet par setellite est disponible au Canada
Au Canada, l'Internet "haute vitesse" par satellite est disponible (environ 80$ par mois). Ce n'est pas conseillé pour les jeux vidéos en-lingne ou pour la téléphonie. Mais pour les bloguer et surfer, c'est parfait!

Deux choix
Il y a deux satellites qui offre le service. Celui de DirectWay des USA et celui de Telesat Canada. Deux exemples de revendeurs autorisés: xplornet.com et
galaxybroadband.ca .

ENGLISH
Satellite Internet Is Available In Canada
In Canada, High Speed Internet by satellite is available for about $80 a month. It is not recommended for online games or Internet phone. But for blogging and surffing, its perfect!


Satellite Internet is available in Canada on two satellites. One is owned by the American company Direct Way and the other by Telesat. If you live north of the 49th parallel, Telesat's is probably your best choice. If you live further north, it may be your only choice!
Two examples of resellers include xplornet.com and galaxybroadband.ca
Xplornet thankfully makes you go to an actual store because their web site is confusing with prices that very depending on where you click.

2006-08-06

Blogging about Kraft Dinner in French

Aurélie Kraft Dinner
Aurélie is a French 31 year old wannabee Canadian girl living in Montreal. She has been writing in French about her move from Paris to Canada's second city. She recently wrote about Kraft Dinner. As per my suggestion, she installed the Geovisitors graphic link on her front page.

20 Countries
To both our surprise, in one week she received visitors from over 20 countries! I counted 17 in one 24 hour period. Her blog had visitors from every region of France and Quebec and many US states.

Minitel is over
Who new so many Internet users could read French? Clearly, the days of the Minitel are over. Her blog is usually quite funny and very entertaining. As she has been in Canada for a while now, the novelty of Canada has worn off so she writes a lot less.

The French love a good cheese story
Part of her blog's popularity is certainly do to her writing style. Although I've seen more than one comment on the Internet from French people wishing they could try cheese macaroni in France. They have the show "Friends" over there and it seems to be their reference point for everything North American. I guess part of the fascination is due to the fact they can't get Kraft Dinner at the restaurant when they visit and nobody in their right mind would serve it to a European guest.

Over Blog
Over blog is the host. It is quite a popular site. Message to Blogger and MySpace, there are millions of potential users out there who have French as a first language.

Adds
Over blog will also pay you to blog by placing adds on it. Not sure if you can really make any money from this. But it sounds less labour intensive than Google AdSense and Performics, which, in my experience, is clearly not worth the hassle (I've made like $10 in two years).

Post in French
Based on Aurélie's results, I may post more in French. I mean, how can a post about Kraft Dinner be that popular?!

Maine should be Canadian.

Maine should be Canadian. They speak English, Canadians speak English, some of them speak French, some Canadians speak French. Maine has high unemployment and is relatively unpopulated. Canada, ditto.

Maine joining Canada would be good for the environment. Otherwise, some of those Bostonians may try the ruin Florida AND Maine when they retire.

As well, Maine joining Canada would lower green house emissions as fewer people would make the detour north via Edmundston when traveling East-West or West-East.

If Maine joined Canada, the Canada-US border wouldn't be as long, allowing American authorities to divert precious funds to the protection of the Mexican-American border.

Few people in Maine can afford to retire elsewhere in the USA. So they would have little to loose. Those who want to take advantage of employment opportunities elsewhere in the USA have already left.

"war almost erupted between New Brunswick and Maine over the location of the border between the United States and Canada"
http://www.gnb.ca/cnb/news/king/2005e0882ki.htm

"Maine lobsters have a problem: Most of them go to Canada, where they are processed and shipped back to the United States as Canadian lobster meat."
http://www.downeast.com/index.php/page/issues/id/225

"Through traffic from Canada into Maine or Maine into Canada is not permitted via the road system in NMW."
http://www.northmainewoods.org/know.html

The Importance of Maine's Economic Ties with Canada
http://www.umaine.edu/MCSC/MPR/Vol7No1/EastWest.htm

Maine Maritime Business Summit Introduction
http://www.aims.ca/atlantica.asp?typeID=3&id=947

French Canadian Emigration to the United States, 1840-1930
http://www2.marianopolis.edu/quebechistory/readings/leaving.htm

MAINE v. GRAND TRUNK R CO OF CANADA
http://supreme.justia.com/us/142/217/case.html

The Great Pop vs. Soda Controversy
http://www.popvssoda.com/

What could happen
http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Maine

Give up Maine or else:
http://www.smdc.army.mil/PubAff/00Press/THEL_Shootdown.html

MySpace

From http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/MySpace (reproduced with permission).

MySpace is the latest and greatest Internet game craze that's sweeping the planet! Everybody is in on it: Jesus, my family, Your mom, Josh Ballard, dead novelists and philosophers, goths, chavs and nerds and Lima-Beans and Emos!

Scoring

The object of the game is to earn as many points as possible in three different categories.

Here's how to score points:

Profile Design

  • Make text an unreadable color (+2350 points)
  • Choose a background that makes your whole page unreadable (+2500 points)
  • Steal a copyrighted video and put it on your profile (+2300 points)
  • Be banned for life after being caught using copyrighted music videos/songs (game over)
  • Be stupid enough to use a MySpace profile editor, such as Thomas' Myspace Editor (+450 points, +314 more if you don't take out the message saying it on your MySpace page)
  • Use a cursor that would not normally be used (+475 points, +200 more if it is an hourglass cursor or a hand cursor)
  • Have pictures that force even 1600×1200 users to scroll left and right (+1200 points, +500 points if its porn)
  • Use the tag for a whole paragraph (+365 points)
  • Create a scrolling photo gallery out of that tag (+730 points)
  • Use the tag for a whole paragraph (+365 points [+1000 if it is used for the whole page])
  • TYPE LIKE THIS (+1500 POINTS)
  • TyPe LiKe ThIs (+2300 PoInTs)
  • type like thissssssssssssssssss (+2500 pointssssssss)
  • Jaja xDDDDDDD!!! O_o type like this :D (+4000 points)
  • ya nigga typeb like dis an i kill yall family cuz 50 cent is kewl (+1 point per spelling error)
  • Cause someone's browser to crash with your profile (+404 points, +5252 if the victim was not using Internet Explorer, +269,064 if the victim was using Lynx or another text-based browser)
  • Use Javascript to cause users to unknowingly add you as their buddy (+1000 points per friend)
  • Create a custom top 8 (+8000 points, +1000 for every additional friend you put on)
  • Hide your top 8 (-12000 points, -1500 if you hide your link to your friends list)
  • Hide your comments (-11000 points)
  • Change your display name to something completely unrelated to your real name (e.g. "i feel -->(INVISIBLE??)") (+370 points)
  • Change your display name to a stupid variant of your real name (e.g. KuH-lAiRe) (+150 points)
  • Change your display name once every 3 hours so no one recognizes you (-1400 points)
  • _~-**Put as many characters in your display name as possible that are not letters or numbers**-~_ (+25 for every character)

Content

  • Put a reference to sex on your page (+690 points per reference)
  • Take ridiculously angled pictures with a camera using angled mirrors. (3,000 Points, each additonal mirror is +1,000)
  • If you are a guy, show a six pack as your main picture (+1,000 points)
  • If you are a girl, show breasts as your main picture (+1,000 points, 5000 more if you are under 16)
  • Put pictures of your drunken stupors (+3000 points)
  • If you are a straight fat girl, put "bi" as your sexual orientation (+1050 points)
  • Put a reference to drinking if you are underage (+1500 points, 900 point bonus if you have pictures of you drinking)
  • Make a reference to really crappy music-group, with a lead singer that looks disturbingly androgynous (+2000 points)
  • Post ASCII art in a comment (+300 points, +500 points if it's that nude ASCII girl, -402 points if it's LUEshi)
  • If your last words are posted to your MySpace (+5000 points)
  • Have a terrible poem in your profile (+300 points, -10 if it's about suicide)
  • Have tildes/asterisks either side of your name (+700 points, +900 if both)
  • Refer to your emo lifestyle (+400 points, +200 more if you aren't kidding)
  • List hobbies as gaming and spending time on myspace (-2000 for gaming, -500 for unhealthy time spent on the internet)
  • Link to porn (-5000)
  • Say you are at MySpace for serious relationships (dependent on gender, females +7000, males -7000)
  • Say that you are really into music (+5000, -10000 if you actually are)
  • Say you play guitar (+7000, +1500 more if you link to a video with you actually in it playing)
  • Say you play guitar, posting a video of it that is actually from John Petrucci (+5000, +12 if you get caught)
  • Say you are in a band, when you really aren't (+15000)
  • Make a reference to a horribly overrated musical act which whores themselves to radio stations. (+4020 points)
  • Add lots of icons that say sappy things such as "If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?" (+500 points per icon. Triple your score if the viewer's browser freezes.)
  • Take your picture using a digital camera and a mirror (+600 points)
  • Take your picture using a digital camera looking out of a window (+400 points, +300 points if you're actually emo)
  • Put game music on your profile (+5000 points)
  • Put pictures of your favorite movies/artists (+100 per artist, +200 per movie)
  • Say that you dislike reading in the "books" section of your interests section (+1300 points)
  • Fill out a personal survey (+2000 points)
  • On the personal survey, under the question "In the past month, have you gone skinny dipping?", answer with a suggestive "Maybe" (+1600 points)
  • If you are butt ugly, use sunglasses in your photo and a black and white photo (+1500 points)
  • If you are hot, put a caption under a picture that says "Ewwww...ugly" or "I hate this picture" (+9000 points)
  • List your religion as "Agnostic" or "Atheist" (+666 points)
  • List your religion as "Christian" or "Catholic" (-666 points)
  • Make ANY reference to "behind you" or "my own little universe" as your location (+650 points)
  • You link to your Live Journal, Xanga, Blog, or Geocities/AOL Hometown pages (+900 per unique link)
  • Put a tracker on your MySpace (+1000 points)
  • Claiming an age of 16+ on the setup page, but then stating that you are 15 or less on the "About Me" section (-200 points)
  • Make a reference to the "The Juggernaut Bitch!" video (+555 points, +777 if you put the video on your site)
  • Lie about your smoking/drinking preference (+400 points)
  • List your smoking/drinking preference as "No / N/A" (+1000 points)
  • Put The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy: And Other Stories by Tim Burton as one of your favourite books (+600 points). If it is the only book in this section, (+1000 points)
  • Take a picture of yourself making a stupid face along with a fake gang sign and a description like "mHM yAh fAShO" or "100% gEtO" (+109 if you are white (and an extra +50 if you're a girl)),(-15000000 if you're actually black or in a real gang.)

Interacting with other MySpace members

  • Carry out a "Yo Mama" conversation through comments (+50 Points)
  • Carry out a bizzare role-playing game through comments (+100 points)
  • Have sex with Douglas Adams (+42 points)
  • Carry out an argument about your ex-girlfriend with your best friend who is also your exes friend. (200 points)
  • Steal someone's "comment virginity" (Post the first comment on their profile)(+6900 points every time)(+10,000 if you actually took their virginity)
  • Become friends with a celebrity (+100 points)
  • Get to really know the celebrity (+6000 points)
  • Become the member of a group (+1000 points)
  • Defame another member (+200 points)
  • Insist that Emo's arent gay (+100 points, then -4999. Tard.)
  • Post a "sexy truck" chain letter, or other similarly-named chain letters, on others' pages (+500 points per truck, +6900 point bonus if you post it on an ugly person's page)
  • If you are a girl, post comments, bulletins and blogs reagarding how sexy or sexi, sexxi, secksi, sexsi, sexxy, secksy and any other misspelling you can imagine all your female friends are (+500 points per friend, an additional +250 points if they are fat)
  • Add a link to your myspace in your AIM, MSN, Yahoo, or internet forum profile (+1200 points; +500 point bonus if the displayed text on the hyperlink is something other than the url of your myspace or the word myspace)
  • Enable one of your pictures for ranking (+5000 points, +65535 points if you average 9.5 or better)
  • Add over +1000 people you'll never communicate with to your friends list (+42000 points the first 1000, 4200 points every 500 thereafter)
  • Have sex with someone you met through MySpace (+1,000,000 points, -2,000,000 if you get caught by Dateline)
  • Cyber with the 48 year old overweight unemployed man who poses as Tila Tequila (+20000 points)
  • Have exactly 777 friends (+777 points. This also puts you in All Lucky 7's mode.)
  • Create a fake rock, punk and or metal band, and have random unknown people form opposite ends of the country post idolizing comments such as "DDDDUUUUUDDDDEEE U GUYZ ROX!!!!!KEEP IT hXc" (+5000 points, add sin(76.3) for every comment posted after the 3rd)
  • Post the same bulletin 3 times in a row (+4000 points, +950 points for every additional copy of the bulletin)
  • Beg people to leave you comments, whether it be on your pictures or your profile (+1800 points, -200 points for every comment you successfully get)
  • Add someone you don't know, and then leave them a comment that says "thanks for the add" (+20,000 points)
  • Make a bulletin bragging about new pictures (+1000, +400 point bonus if you use a misleading subject in your bulletin)
  • Tell a friend every last personal detail to your life and where you will be at any given time for the next year (+600 points)
  • Post a bulletin regarding the reader's untimely demise, posted with a misleading subject (+1230 points)
  • Post chain letters (+500 points, +200 point bonus if it is a letter regarding MySpace shutting down or your account getting deleted)
  • Have Tom on your friends list (-x points, where x is the number of friends Tom has. This can effectively sink you.)
  • Send out the bulletin stating that whoever doesn't repost is only a friend collector & will be deleted "serves them right, acting like this is a popularity contest in high school" (+5000 points, +2800 Bonus points for each friend that you delete because they didn't repost, double your score if you delete Tom for being a "friend collector")
  • Find a fanmade page for a band and leave a comment that consists of declaring your lust for the lead singer and lyrics to several of the band's songs.(+2500 points)
  • Delete a friend (-1400 points)
  • Block a friend (-10000 points)
  • Set your age to 14 so you can make your profile private (-4000 points)
  • Go by your MySpace name in the real world (+200 points, but be eaten by a Grue)
  • Be banned from the MySpace Forums (-100 points, +50 points for posting porn, sexual harassing another user, or engaging in cybersex, +100000 for trolling in the emo forum)
  • Shut down your MySpace (Game over)

The highest score ever achieved while playing myspace was made by a fellow named OMGsooohott6969, who scored 2,930,000 points. It should be pointed out, however, that OMGsooohott6969 has both a six pack and breasts and occasionally states he is a bisexual girl.


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