Election Debate Review: Jeffery Simpson Is Out to Lunch

Jeffery Simpson calls Jack Layton's French in last night's debate "very good". What!? I'm voting NDP, I agree with most of what Layton said during the debate. I was rooting for him. But Jack Layton's French is understandable, as long as you suspend the rules of gramer.

How They Said It

How bad was Layton's French? Dion couldn't stop from correcting him when, for the third time, Layton confused milliard and million (billion and million). Layton also confused mille with million (thousand and million).

The masculine/feminine screw ups could probably be forgiven by many listeners, but it seemed he got them ALL wrong. He made it worse by mentioning his Quebec routs. Seriously, dude, make an effort.

I think what threw off Jeffery Simpson is that Layton often pulls off the Quebec accent. But that is not a good thing when you don't master the language. I would qualify Layton's French as understandable. Harper's French is better because of the way he speaks (slowly).

French on a scale of 1 to 10:

-Dion: 10

-Ducepe: 9.5

-Harper (better grammar than Layton): 5

-Layton (better accent than Harper): 4.5

-May (Tony Blair has better French): 2. (Apparently 0 when it comes to understanding franco-Ontarians).

On this scale, I would rate Dion's Eglish a 6 and Ducepe's an 8.

Isn't it ironic that the most bilingual person at the table is the leader of the separatist party?

What They Said

By the way Jack, Exxon employs 800 people here in Moncton. If you are going to mention an evil company in French, mention one that isn't a major employer of urban Acadians!

Layton was given little time to explain why he wanted to leave Afghanistan, but he didn't even try. He could have scored points there. Although at least he made it clear he was the only leader in favour of an immediate pullout. Dion made a good case for staying in Afghanistan, unfortunately, he also mentioned half a dozen other countries Liberals will be sending soldiers to. Yikes! 

All three leaders made it clear that Harper's 2011 pullout deadline was fictitious.

Layton was pleased that nobody was condemning the Afghan leadership for talking to the Taliban. Hopefully, listeners can read minds (or faces) because he was unable to express his thoughts comprehensibly of that subject. Although if you knew that Layton had been called crazy for proposing talks with the Taliban, you could figure out what he was trying to say.

That isn't very good French...

Must See Australian Video: Tourettes: Out of Control

Tourettes: Out of Control

1000 channels and nothing on. You may have noticed the new channel surfing widget at the top of the screen. If you have enough RAM on your computer, I strongly recommend you take advantage of it. Obviously, most TV it total crap. However, there are a few gems. Most notably the above clip on Australian 60 Minutes. It will bring you to tears.

Top 10 Reasons Not to Vote Conservative

I didn't have much luck with my Top 10 Progressive reasons to vote Conservative , so here is my attempt at the opposite: top 10 reasons not to vote Conservative.

1. Canada has no enemy countries. We should be spending less on the military, not more! The only reason the Taliban hate us is because we invaded Afghanistan. 

If nobody has any intention of invading Canada, we should spend less on the military, not more.

2. The Conservatives raised the age of consent to 16 but want to send 14 year old girls to prison for life! Longer prisons sentences for children will just mean higher taxes and will accomplish nothing. The USA has a jail culture and their crime rate is the highest in the G8.

3. The Conservatives promise a tax credit to first time home buyers. Yes, because encouraging poor people to buy homes they can't afford has worked so well in the USA. And by the way, sprawl causes global warming. If you don't want to be part of the solution, don't be part of the problem!

4. Tax credits for this, tax credits for that. Mr flat tax Stockwell Day is part of your cabinet for crying out loud. Make the tax system simpler, not more complicated.

5. The Harper Conservatives increased my income tax. Seriously, what is the point of having a Conservative government if they increase your income taxes as soon as they get into power?

6. The Harper Conservatives make Brian Mulruney and Pierre Trudeau look like spendthrifts. If we wanted more federal spending, we would elect the NDP!

7. Tax credit for youth sports is a gross interference in a provincial jurisdiction. Some places have highly subsidised sports centres with low fees. The Harper Conservatives are lowering the income tax bill of people who live in places that don't. If you aren't going to respect provincial jurisdictions, what is the point of having provinces?

8. Pro Israel. Many Evangelical Christians are staunchly pro-Israel because they would like North American Jews to move there. I fear Harper and many Conservatives share this view.

9. Via Rail, CBC, Health Canada. You know they will be cut.

10. Cut to the arts. This isn't Australia. We have winter and need entertainment! 

Ipsos Is Making Me Watch the Debate

I fast forwarded during the American presidential debate. Boring. The only thing I learned was that McCain refuses to visit the Prime Minister of Spain. Spain! Also good to know, Spain is part of NATO. But I probably knew that. 

If the Black guy from Hawaii (who wrote two autobiographies!) and the maverick from Panama can't hold my attention, who will? Certainly not the Canadian party leaders during the French debate today at 21:00 (Moncton time), 20:00 in Montreal-Ottawa-Toronto (9PM and 8PM).

Unlike McCain and Obama, Harper, Dion, Layton, Ducepe and May never lived is Asia. And I'm sure they would all agree to meeting the Prime Minister of Spain.

Not only will the debate be in the distant second language of three of the five, they will be sitting down!  

So why will I watch? So I can get my reward points for Ipsos. Ipsos points are like pesos, only less valuable. They are paying me to watch the French debate and answer a survey immediately after. The results will be announced on Global National.

I just hope Harper comes equipped with some good DeGaule texts.  

Online Paperless Lottery Tickets: doing my part to save the environment

You invest/gamble you life savings online, why not buy online lottery tickets?

There must be a least a hundred places to buy a Lotto 6/49 ticket within a km from my Moncton home. And although I literally walk past the Atlantic Lottery Corporation's headquarters every day, I keep forgetting to check my ticket and claim my winnings.

Now, at least in Atlantic Canada, you can buy individual 6/49 tickets online. You can upload money to your account using your credit card, online bank transfers and food stamps (kidding about food stamps). More importantly, they will automatically notify you when you have won, and upon your request, wire the money to your bank.

This is the perfect solution for those of us with an unhealthy fear of oversized novelty checks.

Be forewarned that when you sign up, the weekly spending limit is firm. I managed to win some money in the instant games, but I couldn't play that money after reaching my spending limit. Fine, I thought, I'm a smart person, I'll just temporarily increase my spending limit. Unfortunately, I have to wait 7 days for that to happen! I'm pretty sure the waiting period for a gun permit isn't that long. So just like a gun permit, best to get one before you need it.

I was about to give myself a huge weekly spending limit in case I hit an other winning streak but the maximum is $99. Remember, this includes spending winnings.

As a taxpayer, I'm happy New Bruwswick has online gambling. Basically, everybody with an Internet account will now be forking over 5 grand a year to alc.ca . The reason I say this is that the entertainment value is pretty big. If you take proper hygiene precautions, taking a dump with a laptop will never have been so much fun. Nothing quite like the thrill of betting on hockey 9 days after the end of summer. Gambling helps in the caring element which is essential when following sports. And unlike an illegal booky, your credit card company isn't allowed to physically hurt you (except for stress related ailments).

Some of the instant games are pretty addictive. Spending $1 quickly turned into a $40 win at a poker type game. Of course, I got greedy, let it ride and lost it all. A dice game is also fun, but the warning that the odds aren't the same as actual dice is kind of off-putting. That is what really bugs me about lottery companies in Canada, they go out of their way to hide the odds. Buying a 6/49 ticket will give you a 1 in 13.9 million or so chance to strike it rich. Two tickets will buy you a 1 in 6.95 million chance. Is the odds difference really worth the extra $2? Put it an other way, buying a 6/49 ticket is pretty stupid; but buying two 6/49 tickets is twice as stupid. But at least online you are saving valuable line-up and ticket verification time. 

So when is Alcohol NB going to implement online beer delivery?